Right. Totally motivated with my new diet. The Dukan Diet! It says I will lose a gazillion pounds (am not sure how much a pound is worth in Australian measurements but sounds heaps hey?) in no time and I will see results in the first day! Well, it is day two and am still a fatty!
Prior to trying this Dukan Diet, I tried Michelle Bridges 12 Week Body Transformation. The only real transformation I had during that twelve weeks was I became a better cook due to new recipes. The beginners exercise made no sense to read let alone DO! So I moved on to my next adventure and left Michelle behind.
Following the failure of the Michelle Bridges diet and exercise program, I participated in the Dry July where by I consumed no alcohol for a whole month and then continued into the next month. Still no weight loss.
Then came the meal replacement protein shakes. Whist this was the best one yet, I put on 2 and a half kilos! I replaced too bloody meals with milk shakes and put ON weight!! What is with that??
So now I am on the Dukan. Lets call it the Dukes because that sounds a whole lot better ok? Now, I am only aloud to eat protein for the first five days. When I read that I was like NOICE! I love meat!
Day 1’s food was
2 Boiled eggs
100 grams of Lean Roast Beef
1 Porterhouse Steak
2 Chicken breast fillets without skin
5.5 litres of water (not including my herbal cup of tea I forced down)
So, that is a great deal of meat huh? Remember I said I love meat? Well, last night when I opened the fridge, I saw a cucumber. It almost had a halo around it. I almost started dribbling just looking at the cucumber! Then, out of the corner of my eye, there was a carrot!! Please oh please let me have a bite! Just a small one? But no, in the book it says this line quite a lot
THIS IS NOT NEGOTIABLE!
I couldn’t argue with Dr Dukan now could I? So, I quickly shut the fridge and ran back into the lounge room. It was a very difficult moment for me, the room was spinning, I was tingling all over. It took all my strength to eat my steak and ignore the cucumber, the carrot, the yumminess of vegetables. What bloody diet doesn’t let you have a carrot? Well, this one obviously but it isn’t fair.
So now, am on day two of Dukes. I am supposed to have lost some pounds already according to the book but I am still in my size fat clothes. I even walked to work yesterday and then walked home. That is over 5 kilometers of activity and there were moments I thought I couldn’t go on. That I might have to phone someone to pick me up. Breathing was tight. I was getting light headed. Ok, so it wasn’t that bad but it was hard work all the same.
I also had my implanon removed (that is a contraception which was in my arm to prevent temporary fatness whereby you end up with a baby) and surely that has been a contributor to my fatness hey? There is a strong feeling in me that this object was in fact the major cause of my fatness. So either tomorrow or the next day at the latest, it is highly likely I will wake up back to my normal weight of skinniness and this blog will change to I WOKE UP SKINNY – THE END.
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