The Olympic Poo

I just did a swan dive poo! I haven’t done one of those forever!

What is it? Well I’ll tell you….

Was on the loo giving my stomach muscles their only work out, pushing that pesky poop out. I was even going a bit red in the face because it was a bit of an effort and when it was coming out I thought to myself, oh dear, this is not even going to fit in the bowl!

Then it came out. It was almost silent as it hit the water which was a surprise in itself because I thought I was going to get a bum wash due to the size of it but nope, hardly a sound. And when I looked in the bowl, it wasn’t there!

My poo had swan dived out of my bum, a perfect 10 score in the field of diving and then gracefully disappeared into the s-bend. Not a crumb was to be seen.

And that is what I call a Swan Dive Poo.